“Art is a lie nothing is real”
-Bo Burnham
i don’t just want a boyfriend i want someone who laughs into kisses and stays in bed an extra hour with me every morning and buys me chinese food when i’m on my period and cries in front of me and lets me cry in front of them and someone i can take quiet baths with or have shower fights with and someone i can just be completely me around and i dont care how corny it sounds i just wanna find a soul mate
there are too many versions of me in the universe! the girl i bumped into but didn’t stop to say sorry to has a version of me in her mind. the guy i let borrow my homework has another version of me in his. even my friends, my family, and everyone i’ve ever met in my life has their own version of me in their minds that i’m not even aware of
you put it into words
Interesting
i want to be kissed. i want someone to grab onto me and pull me in. i want their hands in my hair, on my waist, pulling me in closer, deeper. give me passion. want. need.
People think feminists exaggerate about rape culture but I literally had some guy I’ve never met follow me home tonight after I refused to kiss him, pin me up against a wall and get his dick out, only to say ‘sorry I thought you wanted that’ when I pushed him off me, and then continue following me to the point where I had to stop some pizza delivery girl in her car and ask if i can pretend I know her and for her to wait and talk to me to make sure he’d gone because I didn’t feel safe. I’m not generalising, obviously ’#notallmen’ are like that, but the fact remains #yesallwomen have to be fucking alert to this shit all the time. Feminism is important, rape culture does exist, fuck anyone that says any different.
“I liked the idea of you liking me”
I hadn’t liked anyone in 3 years until he came around, but he didn’t like me, he liked my feelings because it made him feel good about himself. It made me feel like shit.
when i was 12 i babysat this girl for a few years and she would come to me and show me her art, drag me by my wrists and point at the pieces she’d made during the week. and she’d be like “do the voice” and i’d put on a sports-announcer olympics-style voice and be like “such form! this level of coloring! why i haven’t seen such perfection in crayola in a long time. and what is this? why jeff, now this is a true risk… it seems she’s made … a monochrome pink canvas…. i haven’t seen this attempted since winter 1932… and i gotta say, jeff, it’s absolutely splendid” and she’d fall back giggling. at the end of every night she’d check with me: “did you really like it?” and i’d say yes and talk about something i noticed and tucked her in.
she was just accepted into 3 major art schools. she wrote me a letter. inside was a picture from when she was younger. monochrome pink.
“thank you,” it said, “to somebody who saw the best in me.”
I just cried.
THIS IS THE CUTEST THING EVER
me: im not gonna rush things ill get around to dating eventually its not at all indicative of my self worth
also me: who here is attracted to me please raise your hand
